Chapter Text
“Kiana the Goddess and Kiana the Human… You do not need to be one or the other, for often you will find people in need of both.”
The words of the Raiden Stigma echoed loudly in her mind as she brushed her palm against the dead Valkyrie’s brow. The leader of this squad was distraught. Angry. Ready to lash out. Kiana couldn’t blame her. She had seen too many of her classmates die during her time at St. Freya. The effect it had on the team those girls left behind. The hollow eyes of the girls that returned to classes after those missions. And sometimes… there were consequences only realized later. There were many ways that her classmates and friends were taken from her besides falling in battle. But no matter how some of those girls fell, it would inevitably leave a hole. A hole that whispered things at night.
“You could have saved her if you’d fought harder.”
“If you had taken better care of her she would still be here.”
“If you were good enough-”
“If”
“If”
“If”
It was always if.
Kiana’s eyes flashed. “If” always brought with it that swirling uncertainty. Always that thought that you could have done more. What if there was a chance things could be different? Dragging a person down like a whirlpool into darkness.
Now, Kiana knew uncertainty wasn’t inherently a bad thing. Many things about her journey had been uncertain. It was her unwavering determination to take that uncertainty and bend it to her will that led to her victory. Humanity’s future without Honkai was not a future of uncertain suffering. It was an uncertain hope . The belief that the strange and unknowable future would bring with it a new dawn and new heights for humanity to rise to no matter what they faced. And as such…
Earth’s Goddess would take the “If” of the here and now, the plague upon her fellow valkyries, tear it apart, and reshape it into that hope with her own two hands.
She could feel the Valkyries around her stumble back as the power stored within her grew. Her body and clothes came alive with amethyst light. The power within her radiating so strongly that those around her might feel that the air itself was settling heavily upon their shoulders. A pressure building in their ears as surely as wonder for the “Moon Goddess” had built in their hearts. Humans frequently fretted over what was possible and what was impossible.
Impossible.
Possible.
The Cocoon didn’t care about such things.
And neither should she.
The Cocoon’s song echoed in her ears. A deep, steadily growing rumble roared in her ears until- with a blink- she suddenly wasn’t kneeling in St. Freya anymore. Kiana blinked a few more times, the nausea from using her powers like this fading faster than what she experienced a few days ago. She looked around at how the extra-dimensional space appeared to her this time. A great grassy plain stretched out in every direction. The brown fronds swayed gently in an invisible breeze. The strangest thing, to Kiana at least, was that instead of the expected earthy smell she was met with… nothing. Like the environment she was in didn’t quite exist corporeally enough to fill all her senses. If she focused hard enough the truth just barely shone through. A faint trail of golden roots snaked through the ground of the entire area and stretched off into the horizon beneath the rustling brown grass. Pulses of light would flow through them towards her, almost like breaths. Or a heartbeat. Whisps of white light like fireflies shifted and floated through the air all around her. They left small trails of white light behind them as they moved. Some continued onwards, some seemed to move erratically, as if confused. The ones that moved forwards…
Kiana raised her eyes to the horizon. The unbroken line of brown grass stretching off into infinity was broken by a singular object. In the distance, a massive cross seemed burned into the air itself. Its white light was like a doorway, the pointed tips of the ends of the cross giving it the appearance of space itself having been torn open like paper.
The Cocoon trilled softly. An undercurrent of curiosity beneath its worried echo that nonetheless left Kiana with a pit in her stomach. If even the Cocoon was afraid… could she even hope to stand against whatever was scaring it so?
In the end, she found her conclusion. In the end… it didn't matter. In the end, she- Kiana Kaslana, the Herrscher of Finality, the Moon Goddess, the Queen of the Honkai- had made a promise. To try. And anything the universe could throw at her paled in comparison to the determined weight her promise had settled on her shoulders.
Kiana’s brow pulled down as a feeling of apprehension washed over her. “What’s wrong?” She pushed the question through their connection. The Cocoon’s whale song echoed back. The urge to turn back almost made her step backwards. Her own apprehension closed its fist around her heart. This was something extremely rare to feel from the Cocoon. But all it gave her was an urge to leave, not the knowledge of what was behind its change of behavior. Did it not know what was beyond this “door”? Or was it just not willing to say? Would she even be able to comprehend it? No option assuaged her heart’s anxious jumping.
Kiana stepped closer. One foot after another. The Cocoon trilled, almost sounding alarmed. Worried. Kiana almost laughed.
Surely by now you would know that we Kaslanas are rather stubborn? The thought bounced around in her head
Another, much more disapproving trill rang through her head.
The closer she got to the breach in the air, the more the atmosphere itself seemed to come alive. The hairs along her arm stood on end as goosebumps shivered across her body. There was a tingling in the air like when Mei summoned a thunderstorm in the midst of battle. The feeling danced across her skin like sparks.
A few more steps.
Another anxious trill from the Cocoon.
She was still so far from the breach.
And then she blinked. And with the next step she was suddenly standing within arms reach. The golden roots pulsed beneath her feet. Each beat a wave of incredible power that quickly disappeared to the horizon. The energy infusing the air was almost oppressive in how it pressed upon her. A tentative, Honkai stained hand slowly reached out towards the blinding light leaking through the world. While the Cocoon seemed greatly displeased with her actions, her connection to her body back on Earth remained as strong as ever.
Her outstretched hand hesitated. The closer she approached, the more she could feel the overwhelming pulses of imaginary energy emanating from the other side. And if she focused a little harder…
She could feel the remnants of the valkyries around her body. The last whisps of themselves connecting them to the world either having long been gone or rapidly fading.
“Please.” She pushed the thought to the Cocoon. “Help me. I know we can do this, but I need help with how.”
The Cocoon trilled hesitantly.
Kiana waited expectantly.
When nothing seemed forthcoming, she wavered.
Until the warmth of the Cocoon's consciousness gently enveloped her like a warm, protective shroud. She couldn’t help the grin that lit up her face.
She touched the breach in reality. The convergence of the roots beneath her feet. And her whole world flashed gold.
“Senti, what is she doing?” Theresa questioned out of the corner of her mouth, though due to the proximity of the curious valkyries around them the volume of her voice didn't exactly lend itself to subtlety.
Senti shot her an incredulous look. “Ehh?! How the hell should I know?”
Theresa shrugged helplessly. “I don't know! You're the one with experience as a Herrscher here, you'd probably know better than me!”
Senti put a hand to her chin, suddenly seeming to take the question very seriously. “It is true that the great Herrscher of Sentience, that being myself, knows much.” She grinned. “Though if I had to guess, she must be doing something similar to what she did to help Mei. Think of it as…” she rolled her wrist as if cranking a wheel like it would help her search her mind for the right term. “As like astral projection.” She shrugged one shoulder, ignoring the Valkyries obviously listening in on their conversation. “Though the reality is much more complicated than that. I can do all sorts of things with people's Sentience and perception of reality, but Kiana can do that shit into other dimensions just as easily.”
Durandal chose that time to arrive from wherever she'd been on Theresa’s other side. “How do you know this, if I may ask?”
Senti huffed. “Because she told me, duh. She asked for advice when she first started experimenting with her weird dimensional stuff, obviously I’m the best one to help with that. Even though… after that she learned how to use it to circumvent my mental defenses whenever she pops in to check up on m- To bug me about where the Old Timer is.” Senti looked away with an annoyed huff. “She acts like me and the Old Timer are attached at the hip.”
Theresa couldn't hold back a soft snort at that.
“Why you-” Senti began.
“Huh?” Theresa looked up at the suddenly silent former Herrscher only to find her staring squarely at Kiana's crouched form.
Durandal stepped forward. “I feel it too.”
Theresa paused to focus her senses and quickly felt a familiar tingle emanating from her stigmata.
Kiana's Honkai levels were rising rapidly.
Theresa quickly turned to her companions. “Senti, do we need to run?”
Sentience hesitated for a moment. One moment turned to two, and the words that would send the valkyries scattering clung to the tip of Theresa's tongue. Until Senti slowly shook her head and relaxed her stance. “No…” she tilted her head. “It seems she's keeping it contained within herself.” She saw Theresa relax and quickly added, “Don't get me wrong, she could probably cause another great eruption if she released it all right now, but it doesn't feel unstable.” Senti tapped a finger to her lips as she observed. “Heh, oh she's good.” She murmured. More to herself than anyone else, but a confirmation like that from a known Herrscher sent relieved looks around the gathered women.
Theresa sighed, “I trust Kiana, but I can’t deny I’m struggling just letting the wounded wait around like this…”
A gauntleted hand firmly, but comfortingly, gripped her shoulder. Durandal locked eyes with Theresa and flashed her a confident smile.
“So,” Senti began again, “When do you think she’s gonna start glowing again?”
Silence.
Everyone’s eyes were on Kiana. A beat. And then two. Kiana remained the same.
“Tch.” Senti frowned in disappointment. “Dammit, I thought I’d have good timing there…”
The attention on Kiana was temporarily stolen as a new voice spoke out from behind the former Herrscher. “Heh, I didn’t expect to find you keeping everyone’s spirits up, Senti.”
Theresa spun, eyes wide, and immediately pointed an accusing finger at the newcomers. “You!!! You’re supposed to be in bed!” Her finger then jumped to the woman assisting her friend to walk. “And you! Why are you helping her?!”
Fu Hua smiled apologetically. “Well, Mei has always been rather stubborn when it comes to Kiana.”
Durandal raised an amused eyebrow, “That’s putting it lightly.”
A few of the valkyries still standing cried out in relief. “Professor Raiden! You’re alright!”
Mei smiled softly at her former students. “I’ve been better, but thanks to Kiana I’m still standing.”
Mei and Fu Hua shuffled towards the kneeling white-haired woman and she directed her attention back to Theresa. “My core may be dormant, but it’s still sensitive to Honkai energy. How could I stay in bed while feeling my wife building up energy like this?” Fu Hua and Mei came to a stop a few steps away from the woman. The former Herrscher of Origin scanned the area, her brow furrowing as she took in the dead and injured Valkyries. Her gaze eventually fell back on her wife with a curious tilt to her head. “What is she trying to do?” She murmured.
“I-” Theresa hesitantly began.
“She said… she wanted to help…” A sniffling voice came from Kiana's side. An obviously distraught Valkyrie raised her head to meet Mei’s eyes. “Her eyes started glowing and then she closed them. The air got heavy and all the purple on her started glowing but then… it all faded…”
“How long ago?”
“Uh…” The girl faltered and looked up to a disgruntled girl standing across from Kiana and the fallen Valkyrie she seemed to be attending to.
The girl (who must be the team leader, if Mei had to guess) exhaled a sharp, annoyed breath. “It’s been about fifteen minutes and there’s been nothing since she did her little eye trick.”
“Heh, it might seem like nothing’s happening, but it was more than just a little light show, I assure you.”
The girl looked Mei up and down for a moment before sighing heavily. “I suppose if anyone knows what this lady is capable of it’d be the one that walked up calling her her wife.”
“Do you really not recognize Professor Raiden?” One of the other Valkyries piped up.
“Of course I do.” She bit back. “I would think it’d be obvious I’m not really in the mood for the hero worship you all seem to love so much right now.”
“Girls, please.” Fu Hua admonished.
Mei placed her free hand over the hand Fu Hua had slung around her shoulders. “It’s okay, Hua.” She locked eyes with the cold stare of the valkyrie captain. “She was important to you, yes?”
The woman nodded sharply.
“Kiana knows what it is like to fight for a loved one and lose them like this too…” Mei closed her eyes, one could only imagine what memories she must be flashing behind those closed eyelids. No one at St. Freya was a stranger to the part in the Honkai War Raiden Mei had played. The parts Theresa had let be officially published, at least. After a few moments her violet irises revealed themselves once more, accompanied by what the weakened woman could muster for a confident smile. “And that’s why I know that when Kiana Kaslana promises to help someone fight for their loved ones, she will do everything in her power to keep that promise.” She chuckled softly. “And everything in her power is quite a lot indeed.” Many of the Valkyries gazed at her with a newfound interest. After all, it wasn’t often they got to hear the great Professor Raiden speak about the Moon Goddess.
The girl kneeling next to Kiana attempted to dry her still wet eyes. “You speak from experience, don’t you?”
Fu Hua cut in. “Lets not push into their private affairs now.”
“It’s alright, Hua.” Another squeeze of the ancient warrior’s hand helped placate her friend’s worry. “When we were students, she was much the same but more… foolhardy. She believed it was her duty to save everyone. The Kaslana oath, she called it. She always told me her father said that it was an honor to fight for your loved ones. To stop at nothing to protect the world. To become a shield.”
This time it was Fu Hua who released a short laugh. “Kaslanas are self-sacrificing to a fault, and Kiana is no different, though at least she’s not so terrible about it now.”
“I’ve heard stories.” The Valkyrie captain spoke. Her eyes gazed into Mei’s with an intense sharpness. As if searching for something. “About how Kaslanas are headstrong, brash and stubborn to a fault. Irritating, dangerous, and seemingly suicidal in battle, more likely to get you killed than anything else with the stunts they pull.” One of the other Valkyries began to open her mouth, an affronted look plastered over her face. Though before she could say anything, the woman held a hand up to stop her and continued. “But also the best friend someone could have. Someone who’ll always have your back, even if it might be to their detriment.” The girl shrugged. “You can never trust stories too much though. I figured all this amazing, world saving self-sacrificing bullshit was mostly exaggerated to make them look more noble. The only thing shit like that accomplishes is make their families and friends lose a loved one.”
Mei let out an amused huff. “You know, I’ve felt much the same after seeing what internalizing that way of thinking did to Kiana.” Her eyes grew lidded with a heavy sadness, lingering on the still unmoving Herrscher. “She wanted to save the world, but believed it her duty to stand alone while doing so. It almost did kill her, just like so many Kaslanas before her.”
“Well she must’ve done something right if she’s still here then, yeah?”
She shared a glance with Fu Hua. “She did.”
The celestial held her gaze for a moment. “You sure you’re alright? You usually don’t speak about these things so much.”
Mei hesitated. “You might be right.” She pushed a hint of amusement into her voice. “That’s probably enough personal information for now.” The valkyries around her seemed to deflate a little, sheepish, ashamed looks on their face.
As if waiting for the right moment, it was at that second that the honkai fused with Kiana’s body exploded into a brilliant light, causing the group of wounded Valkyries to take several startled steps back as they were nearly blinded.
Senti threw her hands into the air. “Oh so when I do it, I’m left hanging, but when it’s Mei -”
Senti hardly had time to get out her complaint before the air around them seemed to crack like glass. Kiana’s face twisted into a pained grimace as the air grew heavy.
Theresa's footing wobbled. “Durandal…”
Before anyone could react, the light emanating from Kiana seemed to sink into the ground before expanding through it, lighting up the entire area with an amethyst circle of power. Durandal had barely blinked when there was a deep rumble that shook the women to their very bones. An ear piercing crack of shattering glass echoed through St. Freya as the light then exploded upwards. The light seemed to whip at their hair and battlesuits like wind, though their feet remained firmly planted to the ground. The low rumble began increasing in pitch though the chaos and made the sound increasingly difficult to focus on, like trying to pick out a random conversation from a talkative crowd. The intensity of the light was blinding, and seemed to only grow more and more until the whole world went white. The echoing sound of an ethereal whale call shook the world around them and bounced around their skulls.
Then all at once everything stopped.
The sudden silence was so jarring Theresa nearly stumbled to the floor as her eyes readjusted. Durandal's armored hand was the only thing that kept the principal from a rather embarrassing fall.
The murmurs and incredulous groans of the other valkyries remained the only sound for a few moments. Until the rustling of cloth and gasping of breath all around them cut through their words like a knife through air.
“ANIKA!!” The girl next to Kiana shrieked and grabbed at the body on the floor, tears streaming down her face.
Only, as Theresa and her friends looked closer…
“No fucking way…” Senti exclaimed in a low voice.
Every Valkyrie not currently busy with Anika hurriedly turned and ran their gazes over the rest of the makeshift medical area. Slowly, stiffly, bodies began sitting up, raising limbs, calling out confusedly. All things that should have been… impossible. A chaotic rumble of footsteps heralded the mad dash of Valkyries running back to their squadmates’ sides. Shouts of incredulous amazement raced through the air quickly followed by exclamations and sobs of joy.
All eyes snapped back to the head of white hair slowly rising as a certain woman carefully got back to her feet.
“Kiana, you…” It was rare indeed for Durandal to be at a loss for words. “How?”
Kiana stood in silence for a moment. She slouched in exhaustion and the usual luster of her eyes was faded and unfocused, as if her focus was still a million miles away. “Once their soul dissipates… one cannot be brought back to life.” Kiana began softly. “The world allows a mind to find another matching vessel. But does not allow a vessel to gather the pieces of a mind…” Her friends approached closer. Kiana's eyes remained distant. But the stars of Finality within them seemed to shine as bright as a star, “I felt these words hewn into the imaginary space of the Tree, a mere fleeting thought that echoes eternally just as the words themselves echo the ultimate law of the Imaginary Tree.” Kiana's chest heaved as she paused to gulp down breath after breath, as if she had just run a marathon. A shaky arm lifted up to brush the gleaming beads of sweat from her brow, “But the Honkai…” Her eyes glowed softly. “We hate being restrained by laws. So we… circumvented it. And I used the almighty Tree itself to guide their minds home.” Kiana was still panting but found it in herself to glance at her family and lover and shoot a small smile, “It was almost too late for some of them. But I made it. I kept-” Kiana wavered, stumbling as she tried to turn to look at the other valkyries. “I kept my promise- Hngh!”
The woman doubled over, her face pinched in pain, her gasping growing more and more labored.
“Kiana?!” Mei practically lept from Fu Hua's arms to grab her wife's shoulders and look her over frantically. “Kiana what's wrong?!”
“I don't…” Kiana wheezed. “Something’s wrong with my core…” Her face twisted in pain. “The Imaginary energy… Nnnggghh! It burns…” A sound like glass cracking drew her attention downwards. “Oh shit…” The other Valkyries looked on in horror as bright golden fissures cracked open along the hands and forearms of the Moon Goddess.
“Kiana?!” Mei's voice was shaking with fear, but she refused to let the woman go. “Kiana what's happening?!”
“I think-” More cracks. The fissures of gold were now lighting up the black tattoos on her body and spiderwebbing outwards. “I may have fucked up. Just a little.” Mei was forced to let go as Kiana groaned in pain once more and dropped to her hands and knees.
DONG!
The incredible sound of a massive bell echoed through the skies. The deep reverberations of its ring announced its presence with all the grand glory of thunder shaking the sky, and an all encompassing dread settled within all who listened. A golden light in the shape of a cog bloomed into existence under Kiana. The Valkyries hastily moved back, Hua easily dragging Mei away. More cogs formed high in the sky, though these ones took on the appearance of real objects. Metallic, interlaced connections, and slowly ticking away like a clock. Their haphazard appearance was an afterthought to the women as massive clock hands appeared below the cogs above Kiana but so high none could hope to reach them. Matching hands whirled to life underneath Kiana, mirroring the ones in the sky. They ticked forwards, their light suddenly intensified as another frightening toll of that unseen bell shook the sky. Imaginary energy distorted the air around their friend.
And Kiana screamed.