Chapter Text
Dess' room always felt like a portal to a magical new realm.
Knock-knock!
Noelle waited patiently at the door, a kind of excited sway in her movements. Dess always took a bit.
"Yeah?" a deeper voice called out.
"It's me!" Noelle said cheerfully. She never had to say much more than this.
"It's open," Dess would say casually, easily. That's all.
And Noelle would throw open the door and scamper in, shutting it quietly behind, even though Dess wouldn't care.
Dess' room was always so… powerful. Everything from the way it felt, to the way it looked, to the way it smelled even. Dess' room stayed dark, dim at the most. She had enough cyan glow in the dark stickers to see, but Noelle's eyes always needed to adjust to the difference. Dess never had any lights on, simply things that gave off light on their own. The darkness always sent thrills through Noelle's spine.
It was the only room in the house that didn't smell like peppermint and pine trees or fruit cake or sugarplums or vague snowy scents. Dess' room smelled real. It smelled like ink, like paper, like smoke, like darkness. It smelled like oil and wood polish, like dirt and woods and berries, like the world as Noelle never knew it.
She didn't have any Christmas decorations visible in her room, only band posters where even the fonts were so jagged and edgy that Noelle worried she'd get a cut just touching them. Boots and a couple survival knives were strewn haphazardly. Shirts and jeans were thrown to the floor as if she didn't have time to focus on even changing her clothes properly.
And then… her guitar. Dess' guitar felt like the brightest light in the dark. It was the only thing in Dess' room that emitted any lighter color, so eye catching in its ruddy-orange hue, incredibly well taken care of. Unlike everything else in her room, it was always placed delicately against the closet door.
Dess had always been rather obvious about her favorites.
She pulled her headphones down, leaving them hanging and blaring around her neck. "What's up?" Dess asked, an easy smile.
And Noelle couldn't help but smile back every time.
She scampered over the minefield of random junk on Dess' floor, practiced in the ways of Dess' sloppiness. Noelle stood before her sister, hands behind her back, still swaying gently with excitement. Dess' headphones blared music that she wasn't supposed to hear, wasn't allowed to listen to, thrumming with passion in its unabashed rebellion.
Dess sat at her computer desk, doing who knows what. Noelle always wanted to know, but Dess was a bit secretive. It made her feel more exciting. She swiveled her chair to face Noelle, always making sure to give her younger sister focus, where others might brush her away.
Noelle didn't say anything. She didn't want to. Didn't need to. That's what made this so fun. She wasn't nervous, she didn't have to worry about saying the wrong thing. So, without warning, she let out a giggle and headbutted into her sister's shoulder softly.
And Dess chuckled. The cool metal earrings at her floppy ears dangled at the slight movement. Her shoulders didn't even flinch, didn't even seem to register Noelle's antlers pressing into her. "What are you doing, you weirdo?"
"Faha!" Noelle laughed, almost hoping to never speak again, to maybe become mute, to become only understood by her sister. But… talking with Dess was always fun. "I learned it from the Dreemurr's house!"
Dess' smile never faltered, cool and collected as always, even as she asked, "What do you mean, Elly? You're such a little freak."
Elly.
That was Noelle's nickname. Only with Dess. Only Dess really called her that. Sure, maybe Catty copied Dess from time to time, but it was Dess' creation, Dess' name for her sister.
"Apparently goats headbutt each other to show affection!" Noelle said with a giggle.
"Oh yeah?" Dess grinned. "Was Kris headbutting you? Do I need to bop them one again?" She cracked her knuckles.
"No! Faha! No!" Noelle laughed, barely able to contain her jingle. "I mean. Yes. Kris was headbutting me, but not very hard! And they were headbutting Azzy and Toriel, too."
"Psh, weirdly cute for that kid," Dess said.
Noelle's cheeks might have flushed, but in the overwhelming presence of Dess, it didn't seem to matter. "Even Azzy was headbutting them back! Even Ms. Toriel headbutted them! Although, she might have been a little too rough on Azzy…"
Dess let out a whistle. "Phew. You know. Wouldn't mind Azzy's mom headbutting me too hard." She grinned again, knowing full well what she said.
"Dess! Fahaha!" Noelle said, always so easily bubbling with laughter around her sister. Her voice became quieter as she fiddled with her hair. "I, um, probably wouldn't mind either…"
"Right?!" Dess let out such a hearty guffaw, her entire body rumbling with the action. "Hey, don't tell Azzy or Kris we're into their mom, okay? Might make things weird. Plus, miiight break that guy's heart." She sighed.
"He's still got that crush on you, huh?" Noelle asked.
Dess shrugged. "Who knows why? I really don't think I show any interest in that way." Another sigh, her easy smile fading. "He's sweet, but like… You know me, Elly."
You like girls. Noelle thought to herself, unable to speak it. For some reason, it made Noelle's soul pound in her chest.
"I like him. I like hanging out with him." She placed her chin on her hand, blowing a strand of dark black hair out of her eyes. "He's even a convenient little excuse for Mom. She thinks I like him back that way."
Dess and Noelle could never tell Carol how they weren't interested in boys. Maybe Carol wouldn't even take it that badly. Maybe she'd even be… supportive in her own, kind of awful, way. But neither of them wanted to take the risk that Carol wouldn't approve. Because Carol's approval was law. Literally.
Dad, of course, was no trouble at all. 'Ya like girls? Fahaha! Me too! Although, hey, I'm not picky!' And he'd wink as if Asgore was right there and everyone knew who he was winking at. He was convinced Carol wouldn't disapprove, but… Noelle and Dess still never wanted to come out to her. And Dad respected that.
Thinking about Carol always put the two of them in a bit of a dour mood. On the other hand, though, Noelle felt so very glad she had someone who understood her, who also had to grow up under Carol's overprotective and stifling gaze, who also had to learn how to properly deal with her.
So nothing more needed to be said.
Noelle headbutted her sister again.
"Haha, you're so weird!" Dess laughed once more, her darker mood already broken. "I already know you like me, Elly!"
"It's… fun!" Noelle admitted with a giggle, headbutting her one more time, antlers brushing against Dess' rough fabrics, soft golden hair touching Dess' darker, rougher fur.
"Ya know, it does look fun." Dess smile turned mischievous, the kind of smile that always made Noelle's soul race, the kind of smile where Noelle never knew what Dess would do next. Maybe it should have been obvious.
Dess headbutted her right in the gut. Noelle stumbled backwards, breath knocked out of her, tumbling to the floor.
"Shit!" Dess cursed, bolting out of her chair. Her headphone wires clung back and pulled her awkwardly. She cursed again and tossed it to the side. She helped Noelle up. "Sorry. Didn't mean to—oof! Hey!"
Noelle, even in her daze, still managed to headbutt Dess back.
"Fahaha! You must really like me!" Noelle giggled, clutching her stomach, out of breath.
Dess rolled her eyes, standing nearly a head taller than Noelle, even with the antlers. "Oh, yeah, I love you, Elly." She pointed a finger at her open mouth and pretended to gag.
Noelle jingled. "Um, excheese me? Don't pretend like you don't!" Another headbutt. Dess' tummy was in the perfect spot after all.
Dess grunted, a little burst of air escaping. "You're askin' for it, Elly! Don't make me show you how much I 'love' you." Her laughter betrayed her threat.
Noelle had always been shy. She always had trouble opening up to people. Even Kris, even Azzy, who she knew her entire life. There was still always this tiny invisible barrier, this little unknown that gnawed at the back of her mind and made her afraid to be herself. After some time, of course Noelle could loosen up! But… with Dess, she didn't feel like she had to worry at all.
Dess, more than anyone, seemed to truly understand Noelle.
"Betcha don't love me more than I love you!" Noelle taunted, preparing another clumsy headbutt. With a giggle and the grace of what Dess described as a 'doofus,' Noelle attempted to ram her forehead into Dess' comfy stomach once more.
Hands.
Noelle froze on the spot, halted mid-headbutt. Dess' hands had grabbed Noelle by the antlers, keeping her in place. Dess' hands were rough, but still furry. She had always been tough. Always been strong. She kept Noelle back without even breaking a sweat.
The thing about antlers (and Dess knew this) is that they were actually quite sensitive on deer monsters. Covered in impossible to see bumps and fur, they were surprisingly sensitive to touch. The nerve endings beneath her velvet burned a strange tingling sensation as Dess gripped them. Not to mention, fellow antler folk understood what it meant to touch another's antlers.
Antlers were an expression of the self, an expression of the soul. Some shaped their antlers to better fit themselves, but most tended to feel content with the way their antlers grew in. Noelle's had always been rounded, safe, almost timid in the way they couldn't hurt anyone. The shape reminded her of a clover (obviously a cross), but she liked to think of them more like snowflakes or wings.
And Dess was grabbing them.
"Not so tough now, huh?" Dess said with a smug tone. Noelle couldn't even look at her, stuck in a strange bowing position, her antlers, her hair, her cheeks tingling as Dess held on tight, like one might dual-wield weapons.
"Ah-um-I…" Noelle tried to say, the wires in her mind crossed together.
"Ha. You're so easy," Dess said, pulling Noelle's head back up to face her, hands on her antlers like a puppeteer. Noelle readily gave her body's control over to Dess, staring up at her in a confused wondrous silence.
Dess' antlers were so sharp in comparison. So very similar to Noelle's in a way, but more like a cross (or snowflake or wings) made up of spikes. Noelle had always been jealous, had always wished her antlers could be as cool as Dess'. Noelle could grab Dess' antlers if she wanted, and she would but there was always that exciting fear that Noelle might hurt herself if she tried to get close to Dess.
"Mm," Noelle tried to pout, her head, her hair still tingling. "No fair! I can't reach your antlers."
"Sucks to suck," Dess said, that easy smile plastered on her face. "Now…" her voice went low, almost evil. "Let me show you how it's done."
Eep!
In a cool motion, so swift and punk and practiced from her music playing, she flicked Noelle's antlers, causing her to stagger backwards from the sudden flash of pain. Moving like melted snow, she ducked her head down and wham!
Headbutt!
Luckily, Dess was very safe with those sharp antlers of hers, knowing full well she'd impale Noelle like a pin through a piece of paper. All the dangerous bits missed, but, oh how it made Noelle lose her breath, the way they sliced through the air near her vitals.
Noelle fell backwards once more, stumbling over a damaged flute and landing on her behind, back to the wall. "Cheezus!" she huffed out, still reeling from the blow.
This time, Dess showed no remorse. She stepped over to Noelle, knelt an arm down on one knee and said, "I warned ya."
Angel above, she was so cool.
"You didn't have to hit so hard!" Noelle whined, rubbing her belly, really hamming it up. She honestly barely even felt the pain. If anything, it was the touch on her antlers that made her breathing heavy.
"Aw, c'mon, Elly…" Dess sighed and squatted down to face level with Noelle. "I didn't hit you that hard."
Noelle's soul skipped a beat.
"Gotcha!" In a flash, Noelle's hands stretched out and grabbed Dess by the antlers as well, fingers avoiding the spiky bits.
"H-hey!" Dess huffed out, eyes widening. That air of coolness faded away pretty quickly, didn't it? "Hold on, that's cheating!"
Noelle's smug smirk could not be contained, putting her nose high up into the air in posh victory. "You're pretty easy too! Fahaha!"
Dess frowned, smile wiped off. She furrowed her brows, and Noelle saw the way her legs and arms tensed up. She lunged for Noelle’s antlers.
Noelle shrieked, and…!
“H-hey!” Dess froze in place, hands trembling just before Noelle’s antlers. The red at her cheeks only stood out more against her shiny black nose. “Noelle!”
Noelle giggled. Her thumbs stroked the sides of Dess’ antlers, rubbing gently, oh so gently. She didn’t have the strength to hold Dess back, but she certainly could stop her sister in other ways.
“What~?” Noelle asked, a lilt in her voice.
Dess raised her arm to try and cover her face, trying to hide her cute little whimpers. “Noelle, that’s messed up and you know it.”
Noelle’s smug power quickly faded. “What? No fair, you started it!”
Dess shivered, looking away. Noelle hadn’t stopped. “Geez, Elly, I didn’t rub you like this though.”
Noelle’s soul sank and she relented, allowing her hands to drop to her sides. (I guess it is pretty weird of me to do that…) “Oh… Sorry, De-e-eeee!!!!!”
“Gotcha, idiot!” Dess cried out triumphantly, her larger hands thrumming and stroking Noelle’s antlers like guitar strings, able to cover way more ground than Noelle ever could.
“Ahh–ahhahahaha!” Noelle squealed with uncontrollable laughter, her entire body tingling and screaming with electric sensation. “Dess…!”
Dess grinned and moved closer, her larger body shadowing Noelle’s like a furry blanket, her short black hair smelling like fresh ink, dark lipstick glittering like a knife’s edge. She let out a heady little laugh, Noelle literally in the palm of her hands. “You’re still way easier, Elly.”
It was all so much! All so wonderfully exciting! Noelle’s fur bristled in all the right ways as she continued to laugh, her hands uselessly sliding off Dess’ small but firm arm muscles. And then, oh, and then she could feel Dess’ breath! The aftereffects of Noelle’s touch from before left Dess in a panting, husky state, as if she’d been singing at a concert not long before.
Noelle, giggles and jingles escaping her till she couldn’t breathe, kicked her legs out half-heartedly, hooves not even making a dent in Dess’ jeans. Dess just crawled closer on her knees, between Noelle’s kicks. “Learned your lesson yet?” Dess asked, voice gravelly.
Something in Noelle’s chest began to shine. Deep inside the bubbling well of this tingling sensation and all this horribly shrill laughter, she managed to reach her determination and–
“Never!!!”
–reached out and grabbed Dess’ antlers in her palms again, rubbing them and stroking them as much as she could while the rest of her body disobeyed.
“Pshhh, hahahaha, Noelle!!” Dess also fell into a pit of laughter, but oh, her laughs were so cool! Like the strings of an electric guitar! So rough and loud! They sent vibrations through Noelle’s already overstimulated body. “You suck!”
“You suck!” Noelle countered lamely, hardly able to fight back. She fell forward into Dess’ arms, against her chest, laughing up into her furry chin while still trying to tickle her sister’s antlers, reaching up around Dess’ neck.
“Smelly Elly, Smelly Elly!” Dess chanted into Noelle’s ears, breaking only to continue laughing. She wrapped her legs around Noelle, pulling her into a cross-legged embrace on her lap. Dess had to move her arms in an awkward position to keep hold of Noelle’s antlers, but she didn’t push Noelle away either.
“Fahahaha, shut up!! Messy Dessy, Messy Dessy!!” Noelle said, laughing so much that tears began forming in her eyes, arching her back and body into Dess.
“Ha! Hah! That’s like the least bad thing you could call me! Hah!” Dess huffed out through rough bursts of laughter, her wonderful chuckles mingling with Noelle’s jingles, teasing the tips of each other’s noses with their breath.
Noelle couldn’t even respond anymore, having too much fun, completely breathless in Dess’ clutches. Her last line of defense… she resorted to headbutts!
Take that! And that! Right into her cheek, nearly right on her head! Noelle gently bapped the back of her head into Dess. She squirmed and writhed and wriggled, but she wouldn’t lose! Nobody could beat Dess! Except Noelle. Noelle had the cheat sheet when it came to beating Dess.
“Pshhh, you weirdo, think that bothers me?” Dess said, her fur clearly still on end as she tried to stay calm. “Like this! This is how you do it!”
In a flash, she spun Noelle around in her legs, making Noelle face her. Both had relented in their hands’ assault, and both were huffing and puffing like they just ran an entire mile in record time.
With a lingering little laugh, Dess bonked her fuzzy forehead into Noelle’s.
“Fahaha!” Noelle jingled, bonking her forehead back into Dess too. She felt the way their antlers brushed against each other, their sensitive velvet rubbing just ever so slightly with each bonk.
“You know, you have a pretty hard head,” Dess teased, bonking her again, those sharp antlers just narrowly, oh so narrowly, touching against Noelle’s. Not enough to hurt, but certainly enough to make the two girls let out a tiny hitch that they pretended not to notice. “One advantage you have over me!”
“You’re the hardheaded one! Your skull is made out of diamond!” Bonk! Noelle’s shoulders heaved, body aching with all this excitement. She nuzzled her forehead against Dess’ and felt little sparks in her chest, their snouts so desperate for air, so close.
“So it’s a rare and valuable resource?” Dess countered with another bonk, nuzzling back into Noelle’s forehead, arms wrapped tightly around Noelle.
“Yeah! We should sell you!” Noelle giggled, pressing her head into Dess’. She didn’t have the strength to headbutt anymore. But just the pressure, just the nuzzling, just that incredible feeling of their antlers coming closer together. She held onto Dess as well, as if she’d fall off a cliff if she let go.
“You wouldn’t,” Dess breathed out with a smile, head gently pressing back, nuzzling back, their antlers mingling together. Even though they weren’t struggling, even though they weren’t fighting anymore, for some reason the two of them continued to breathe so heavily.
“Mm… I…” Noelle started to say, beginning to lose herself in Dess’ comforting arms, her electric antlers. She didn’t finish her sentence. She couldn’t. She forgot what she wanted to say. Such a strange haze washed over her head, such a pretty little flitting feeling that made her so warm.
“See?” Dess said, voice so low, so quiet, nuzzling evermore. “I knew you… wouldn’t…”
This, oh… this was… bliss? This was pure bliss, wasn’t it? Noelle felt so pleasant, so safe, so warm, so happy. She let out a strange little noise, like a yawn but… more.
“You’re being…” Dess said slowly, her breath practically dripping out of her dark lips. “You’re being weird, Elly…”
“Mmmnn…!” Noelle mumbled, another strange noise coming out, so full of… pleasure? “So are you…” she managed to say.
“We should…” Dess tried to say, her breath hitching. Noelle could feel that wonderful heat from her cheeks, they were so close, nuzzling and rubbing. “We should probably… stop…”
“No,” Noelle breathed out quickly, surprising herself. “No, no… it’s–it’s fine.” She desperately nuzzled deeper into Dess but felt the way her sister hesitated.
“This is… it’s…” She didn’t finish her sentence, didn’t finish that thought. Noelle wouldn’t entertain it, Noelle didn’t care.
Dess began to pull away, agonizingly slowly, nearly making Noelle whimper, nearly begging to stay so close like this.
Snag.
“H-huh?” Dess gulped, their faces just a breath apart. She tried pulling back again. Noelle’s head went with her, buzzing the two of them with excitement. “S-shit.”
“Are we…” Noelle could hardly believe it. This was the best-case scenario. “Stuck?”
“Er, no. No…” Dess tried to say, her black nose slipping against Noelle’s red. Each breath, each word, it all trickled directly into Noelle’s mouth. It was intoxicating.
She pulled again.
“Ow!” Noelle and Dess yelped in sync, lips so nearly touching in their confused movements.
“Sorry,” Dess muttered, averting her dark eyes, unable to keep her gaze tough anymore.
But Noelle. Oh Noelle. She didn’t look away. She didn’t want to look away. She refused to look away. This… this was…
Amazing.
To think. Dess could be turned into a blushing mess like this, a nervous wreck. Wasn’t that supposed to be Noelle’s role? The timid, shy, innocent little sister? Now suddenly, here was Dess, as if she’d never been cool in her life, eyes downcast as she struggled to find a way to untangle herself.
And still, their antlers were singing together. Dancing together. They wouldn’t let go. Noelle wouldn’t let go. Is this what it felt like? To have someone break in the palm of your hand? To be able to shatter someone into so many pieces, just at your mere presence?
It’d be so awful to take advantage of her like this, wouldn’t it?
And yet… and yet…
Noelle, breathless, moved closer, microscopically closer.
“No-Noelle? What are you…?” Dess once again tried to back away, but they remained firmly stuck together.
Noelle couldn’t speak. Dess’ obsidian lips, her nose of hot coal, black hair tickling against Noelle’s… Dess let out a desperate little bleat, a noise that Noelle never expected to come out of her mouth.
Noelle moved in closer. So slowly. Dess jerked back, pulling Noelle hard with her. Something gasped out of Noelle in the sudden movement. “Ah!”
Dess broke. “Fuck,” she breathed out, the curse burning hot on Noelle’s lips.
And so did Noelle.
Their lips finally met after so long, after wanting each other for what felt like an eternity. Noelle wasn’t sure who closed the gap anymore, but she assumed it was her.
They kissed, so rough and passionately, like how they’d been messing around before, but with inhibitions tossed aside. Noelle felt such wonderful heat, a soothing blissful thing at her nose, between her eyes, where their foreheads nuzzled together.
Noelle melted into Dess, carefree, living in such a sinful ecstasy. When their kiss broke, Dess tried to stop herself, tried to stop them, but Noelle knew what she wanted. She knew what Dess wanted.
"Fuck…" Dess repeated, so dejected, so terrified.
"Shhh…" Noelle whispered, kissing her again, hand on Dess' cheek, soothing her. "Don't worry…"
Noelle only knew what to say because it's what Dess used to say. On particularly bad days, when Noelle felt the crushing anxieties of the world, or maybe a horror movie had freaked her out to the point of night terrors.
'Shhh, Elly… Don't worry. I'm here.'
"I'm here," Noelle repeated into Dess' trembling lips.
"Elly, this…" Dess breathed into their kiss, hugging her tightly, so tightly now.
"Shhh. It's okay… It's okay…" Noelle cooed.
And something transformed in Dess' soul. She returned the kiss now, so much harder, so full of that passion that made Dess the best person on the planet. She cupped Noelle's cheeks together, pulling her in, almost desperately, as if taking a breath above the water’s edge and pulling her into a dark abyss.
But it was never enough for Noelle, was it? Always greedy, always so very greedy, always asking for more. Noelle's tongue slipped in, barely, just barely tasting Dess' dark lipstick.
"Fuck," Dess whispered once more, forcing another tiny, 'Ah!' out of Noelle. With a curse and a wince, she gave into Noelle's demands once more as she always did. Her own tongue found Noelle's, pushed it away, licked at her chilled lips with a strange hunger. "Elly, you taste…"
"Mmm?" Noelle buzzed.
Another lick. Another kiss. Dess' eyes stayed half-lidded, black eyeshadow burning beautifully in the dark. "You taste so… good… Like powdered sugar. Fuck, that's… so…" Another kiss. "That's so stupid…"
"I like it." Noelle kissed back, taking another lick. Dess had always been poetic, even if she had a hard time admitting it. Noelle giggled. "Also… that's my chap stick flavor."
"Oh my god." Dess sighed into her wet lips. "Seriously?"
"Yeah."
"It's like you want to be a cliche."
Noelle kissed Dess once more and said, "I do, actually."
"What…?" Dess' eyes teetered through emotions, boarding on pity.
"People let their guard down around me. Even you did, Dess."
"You make it sound so cynical."
Noelle didn't want to respond.
"You really believe that about yourself, don't you?"
She didn't want to respond.
"I know that's not you, Elly."
She couldn't respond.
"You want to be sweet because you are sweet. That's who you are."
Silence.
"You're blaming all this on yourself, aren't you?"
…
Dess' eyes narrowed. "I have free will, y'know."
"I-I know."
Her dark eyebrows furrowed. "Pretty full of yourself to think you controlled me."
"Mm…"
Dess suddenly became stubborn, nearly angry. "I do what I want. Not even you decide that, Elly."
"Sorry."
"Shut up." Dess rolled her eyes. She kissed Noelle once more, tightening her legs around Noelle. "I love you because I love you. Not because you made me love you."
"I…"
"My turn," Dess interrupted, overpowering her. "Kinda pisses me off that you think you could take advantage of me. If anything, I'm the one who…"
"You're not!" Noelle cried out desperately, silencing the words she didn't want to hear.
"I'm not," Dess said with a low growl. "I know damn well it's not just me either. I'm not stupid. I can tell how much you…" she sighed. "Want. Me."
Noelle nodded, their antlers brushing together, making both flinch and yelp.
"Fuck," Dess breathed out, before continuing. "That's why I… pushed you away. Not because I didn't want you. But because I wanted to make sure… it wasn't just me."
"It's not," Noelle said, the words tingling on her lips.
Dess grinned. "I'm pretty fuckin' aware of that by now, Elly."
"Faha." Noelle kissed her once more, her soul an amp for Dess' passion.
"You're fucked up, Elly. You know that?" Dess kissed her back, hardly able to stop herself.
Noelle gave a halfhearted shrug. "I know! Faha." She paused and said, "But it's nice that… that you know too."
Dess blinked.
"It's nice that—that…" Noelle's soul trembled. "…that you understand me."
"Mm," Dess murmured softly to herself. "Lotta people misunderstand you, don't they?"
"Yeah." Noelle sighed. "Yeah."
"Yeah…" Dess smiled. "For better or worse, I know how weird you are, Elly." She laughed. "Leaning towards worse."
"I don't want this to be bad…!"
Dess's lips formed a tight line. "Well, it is. Doesn't matter how much we don't want it to be."
"I hate the idea that this is bad," Noelle pouted.
Dess raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Don't even act. The fact this is fucked up makes it fun as hell for you, doesn't it?"
Noelle stuck a tongue out. "Faha. Yeah. You're right." She kissed her sister again, sparks coursing across her fur.
Dess tried to shake her head, only bringing Noelle with her. "Fuck me, this is fucked."
"I'm tryin' to!" Noelle giggled. (Dad joke. Weird time. Weird time, Noelle.)
"Jesus Christ, you're fucked," Dess said not without a smile.
Noelle stuck a tongue out. "Again. Trying."
"Oh, shut up, freak." Dess kissed her again and again.
"Is that a no…?" Noelle giggled.
"Have you ever heard of subtlety, Noelle?" Dess groaned. "What am I saying? Of course you haven't."
"You haven't answered the question," Noelle said, braver than she'd ever be with anyone else.
"I'm not going to!" Dess nearly yelled.
"… Not going to tell me, or not going to f—"
"Fuuuck offff, Elly!" Dess groaned again, kissing her once more just to make her shut up. Noelle didn't mind. Positive reinforcement!
"I'll be good, I'll be good, fahaha!"
"No you fuckin' won't." Dess sighed. "That's why I love you."
Noelle's soul blazed like a sparkler on a bright stage. "I love you too, Dess." One more. Just. One more kiss. One more…
Her lips tasted like the dark. Like the forest. Like shadow. Like mystery. Dess was so exciting. So very exciting. She kissed with more experience, more understanding of where her lips should be, how her lips should touch Noelle's. Whereas Noelle was simply clumsy and greedy.
How many other girls had Dess kissed before? Not that Noelle minded. She wondered if this is what those other girls tasted like too. Noelle always wished she could be as free and brave as Dess, always wished she could go out and make the world her own just like Dess did. But the only person she could even be brave with was Dess.
When Dess put a gentle hand on Noelle's shoulder, she knew their kiss was ending, knew they had to part. She tried to linger, tried to stay close to Dess for any moment longer she could, but that tiny push, that quiet lean back, it told Noelle that this was over.
And she knew it had to end. Knew this wasn't something they could keep up, keep doing forever. Yet, it still made her soul ache. Her lips faded away, her scent wasn't quite as overwhelming, and it felt so very cold. Noelle knew she was addicted; knew she shouldn't have let herself become attached so.
"Don't look so sad, Elly," Dess sighed. "Come on."
Their antlers still tangled, still buzzing lightly, Noelle said, "I don't want it to end," selfishly. She tried to look away, but their eyes always remained in each other's like this.
"Well…" Dess pet the back of her neck, sheepish. "It really should."
"Are we just going to pretend it never happened?" Noelle asked, soul trembling.
Dess didn't reply. She tried to look away. They still couldn't avert their gazes. Noelle knew.
"Can I… not even talk about it with you? Ever again?"
Dess sucked in a breath of air through her teeth. "We really shouldn't, Noelle."
"But it felt so good," Noelle argued weakly. "Didn't it?"
Dess closed her eyes, as if contemplating, struggling. "It's fucked up, Noelle. You know it is."
"I don't care."
Dark eyes opened, burning in the night of her hair, determined, steady. "Don't you?"
"I-I don't!" Noelle repeated, but even she felt her resolve come to a stuttering end. "I… It doesn't matter in the moment. It shouldn't."
"And," her voice was steady. "What happens when the moment ends?"
Noelle sighed. "I don't want it to end, Dess," she repeated. She knew she was beaten. She could never truly win an argument with Dess. Not with something that mattered. Not like this.
"It will. It has to." She sighed. "We can still be sisters, Noelle. But that's it. Nothing more."
Noelle's soul was distraught. She held onto Dess' hand just like she used to when they were younger. She squeezed. Dess squeezed back.
"Never again?" Noelle asked one last time, a petulant loneliness bubbling inside her.
Dess closed her eyes one final time. Her dark eyeshadow was so pretty. Her earrings always jangled when her ears moved up and down, this time, far down. Her lips, a haunting abyss, formed a hard line.
She said nothing.
Noelle knew the answer. She closed her own eyes this time, unable to gaze at Dess any longer like this. It was only making it harder. She took a long shuddering breath, ready to accept it. For Dess' sake.
"You know what?" Dess opened her eyes, sparkling with dark wilderness. "Fuck it."
Before Noelle could even say, 'Huh?' Dess had already pushed her to the floor, lying flat on the carpet. Of course, this meant Dess came with, cyan stars on her ceiling—at her back. With more force than she expected, Dess pressed her lips down against Noelle's. Rough. Hungry. Demanding. She sighed into her.
"Mmnn—ah…!" Noelle gasped into her sister's mouth, breath stolen away, given willingly. She kissed back, her soul so full, her chest and shoulders so warm and airy, as if floating up into Dess.
Dess tilted her head deftly, kissing Noelle's lips at a slightly different angle, somehow changing the sensation almost completely. Noelle squirmed under her sister's body, that warm haze fogging up her mind with pleasure.
Dess took a rough breath, so full of emotion, so full of strange anger, of rebellion and lust, and it made Noelle's lips twinge with heat. Without warning, Dess bit Noelle's lower lip, pulling ever so lightly, breathing hard into her. Pain blossomed through Noelle's skull like a thorny flower, so very utterly beautiful. The petals seemed to flourish, twinkling in the dew of starlight.
"A-ah! Ah…!" Noelle moaned, barely able to contain her breaths, every hair in her fur bristling with electrical charge.
"Shhhh," Dess shushed, kissing her into brief silence. "Shhhh…" She placed a fingertip on Noelle's lips.
Noelle tried to obey, tried her best to quell these little noises, but they bubbled out of her throat, boiled in her soul, melted away her sense.
And as she winced and bucked into her sister from below, trying so very hard to stay quiet, trying so very hard to obey in the hopes that she'd receive more, Dess took a heady breath.
"Fuck…!" Dess cursed again, as if that wild shadow had taken over her once more, as if she skulked through the forest, soul pounding in her chest, a thrilling chase about to begin.
She kissed Noelle harder, even harder, truly taking Noelle's mouth now, her tongue escaping, dashing into Noelle's, around Noelle's timid tongue and dragging her further into darkness. Dess' hands were wild, still soft with fur, but tough with various nicks and cuts she'd sustained due to her pocketknife. Those hands grabbed at Noelle's body, squeezing, groping every little fold of her skin, exploring, demanding everything.
And Noelle still surrendered herself, allowed Dess to take her away into the woods, into the terrifying unknown.
Noelle's own hands dumbly tried to copy Dess. She groped at her sister's arms, her sides, her chest, exploring for any reactions desperately. At Dess' chest, she let out a hungry groan, mouth wet with saliva and spit.
(There…)
Noelle touched Dess' chest, ran her fingers in the center, cupped and squeezed her hands against Dess' bra under her shirt. Another groan, another drooling sigh as she was forced to break her kiss simply to breath.
"Fuck, Noelle, not… not there…" Dess panted, her face flushed blood red.
(Certainly there…)
Noelle's resolve only strengthened. Her hands, her fingers, they groped harder, they crawled beneath Dess' shirt, under her bra, to find those sensitive pressure points she knew were there. She pressed them, ran a finger around them clumsily, icily.
"…fff—fuck," Dess cursed into Noelle's mouth, pressing her forehead hard against Noelle's. "Elly, you, you can't… keep… touching… there…"
But despite her protests, Dess began to rock against Noelle, hips gyrating and grinding in a guilty uncontrollable rhythm, completely pressing herself into Noelle's.
"Ah… ah…! Ah…! Dess…" Noelle, lost completely to the pressure, to the pleasure, began to rock in a slow sync with Dess, her skin burning between her thighs.
"Stop… hah… Elly…" And Dess let out such a beautiful moan, so melodic and deep, so dark and heavy. "This is… too… much…! I… I can't…"
"I want this… I want this…" Noelle breathed into Dess, greedy, selfish, hungrier than Dess could ever be. Her light moans mingled together with Dess, a chorus of lows and highs at the end of their rope, at the edge of no return.
Dess winced, her fur standing up on end, bristling as she rocked and grinded and pressed herself into Noelle, no longer fighting against this ever-consuming feeling. She shuddered, she tightened her grip on Noelle, and…
And Noelle shuddered in response, still groping blindly, still rocking clumsily, barely in tune with Dess' hard thrusts. That pressure, that amazing dizzying pressure, it took away any and all fear, any barriers that might have been between them, and they fell into the abyss together, drowning in passion and pure pleasure.
Their bodies slowed, their rocking coming to a shaking stop as they finished together in a blinding climax, the stage empty, spotlight hovering over just them. Sweat crystallized down Dess' obsidian hair, against her cheek, through her dark fur. Sparklers went off in their chest, their show a beautiful song just for the other and no one else.
Dess let out a dark sigh, eyes wincing closed as she laid atop Noelle in a useless heap. Noelle gently rubbed her back, trying to press down the bristling fur, trying to soothe her pounding soul. Noelle couldn't pretend to understand. She went willingly into the dark with Dess.
But did… Dess… … not …
Scrape. Scratch. PULL. PULL.
"O-ow! Ow, Dess!" Noelle cried out, her antlers screaming in horrid pain. "Ow, please, stop struggling…!"
"Fuck this, fuck this, fuck this," Dess muttered, blinded with pain, with dark.
"Stop, Dess! You're hurting me! You're hurting yourself…!"
"I don't fucking care," Dess hissed into Noelle's lips.
RIIIIIP!
Noelle screamed out, but Dess merely grunted, even though… even though…
Dess was clearly the one in the most pain.
Dess stood up. Free of Noelle. Leaving her on the floor. Cold. Something was missing.
She said nothing.
But Noelle's eyes widened, horrified, a scream caught in her throat. Blood ran down Dess' passive forehead, forming a river of red down her nose and through her lips. She ignored it. Maybe she didn't see it. Her eyes stared into the dark.
"Dess… your… antler…"
Dess said nothing. She didn't respond. She refused to acknowledge any of it.
A piece of her antler had been ripped off, steaming hot blood trickling from its wound. Noelle, soul frozen, felt her hands reaching up, felt her fingers reaching to her own antlers, even though she wished she wouldn't, wished she wouldn't learn.
And she felt it. A sharp shard of darkness. Still pierced into her antler. It burned with passion, heat, and black. It was stuck into Noelle like a thorn, a painful memory of something that was meant to be beautiful.
"Dess…?" Noelle whimpered out. She shakily stood to her feet. She looked at her fingertips. A splotch of Dess' blood stained the fur. She was shaking. Something wet ran down her cheeks, but she couldn't understand what.
"I fucked up." Dess said suddenly, boiling red dribbling from her chin, into her shirt.
"N-no… no this wasn't…" Noelle tried to say, but her voice came out wrong. So terrified. "This isn't… Dess, I…"
"Stop," Dess ordered. And Noelle's voice left her. "Not right now. Not right now. Don't say it. Not right now."
"Des—"
"Shut up." Her voice went cold as the dead, as the abyss. Yet even now. Her voice softened. Her face fell, broke under the red. "Please."
They stood near to the other. They were barely farther apart than if they had still been stuck together. But now it felt like they were light years away.
Noelle's sob broke the quiet. Dess finally looked at Noelle, finally allowed herself to see. Her eyes, so sharp, so hard, widened and softened. She let out a tiny gasp, barely audible, and moved to Noelle. One hand wrapped around her, the other pressed one final time against Noelle's antler.
It didn't feel nice anymore.
A sharp pain screamed through Noelle's little body, but she could only let out another sob in response.
In the next instant, Dess' free hand held the broken and bloody shard in her hand. She glared at it, seethed at it, clutched her fist around it till it broke the skin in her palm.
But Noelle didn't feel better. She didn't feel anything at all.
"I'm sorry." Dess whispered in the dark, embracing Noelle one last time. She bled into Noelle's hair, down into her mouth, overpowering the sweet tingles of their kisses with an oily copper. "I'm sorry."
"This isn't… But I didn't…"
"I know. I'm sorry. It's not your fault."
Noelle, so weak, so numb, still managed to embrace her sister, clutching desperately at her. "It's not yours either…"
Dess said nothing.
"It's not…!"
Dess said nothing.
"Please…"
"You need to go for now. Clean up. I need to bandage this."
"Dess! Please!"
She winced. "Just. Just go. For now. Please, Elly."
And Noelle obeyed. Without another word, she glided to the door, her nerves frostbitten and faulty. She opened the door, the golden yellow light overpowering her, blinding her. Something pushed her gently through the frame.
Noelle looked back into the darkness, looked back to Dess. She was right there. But Noelle couldn't see her. She couldn't see her anymore.
And Dess closed the door.